After a string of plays with beautiful boys - Beautiful Thing, Shopping & F**king, Bent, East Side Story - acclaimed theatre company Toy Factory Theatre Ensemble has finally come up with something for the girls.
Well, it's about time, we say.
Mergers And Wills, a double bill of Eleanor Wong's groundbreaking plays about the trials and tribulations of lesbian lawyer Ellen Toh, will be staged in Mandarin for the first time this weekend.
The bald-headed (and reputedly very naughty) artistic director of Toy Factory, Goh Boon Teck, says: "I feel that it is time to do so something for my sisters."
Terrific! Not that sisters can't do it for themselves, we're sure. But if Toy Factory's glittering track record is anything to go by, you can expect yet another bold, challenging and immaculately-designed production by the ever-inventive Boon Teck and his team.
Boon Teck makes no bones about the fact that Mergers And Wills has been scheduled to open in the "pink month of August" - his words, not ours - so as to capitalise on happy tourists coming to the utterly fabulous Nation.04 party.
"We hope to draw the Mandarin-speaking gays from Hong Kong, Taiwan, mainland China and even San Francisco to our show," he says.
But never mind, you heard it here girls: There's a possibility that you might meet hot dykes from all the world at Mergers And Wills!
And the show is being staged right on top of Mox at Tanjong Pagar, which means you can mosey on down to the bar after the play and check out who's available.
The two acclaimed plays - namely, Mergers & Accusations and its sequel, Wills & Secession - have been translated into Mandarin by Lianhe Zaobao theatre critic Han Yong Hong.
Discussing Mandarin-speaking audiences, who may be seeing the plays for the first time, Boon Teck and co-director Nelson Chia say they are excited about the kind of reactions they might get from the Mandarin-speaking community.
Nelson says: "There is a perception that the non-English-speaking communities in Singapore are more traditional and may not take to homosexual plays like these.
"But we think that it's a misconception. The Mandarin-speaking community is no more conservative than English-educated one - it's just that they don't talk about issues like homosexuality.
"If you look at the tabloid newspapers in Mandarin, it is clear that they are aware of and open to discussing these issues."
Hmmm, that's a debatable point...
Anyway, Boon Teck and Nelson went to great lengths for research: They read the Penguin's Book Of Lesbian Short Stories cover to cover, went to lesbian bars "many times" and hung out with their "countless" dyke friends more often than usual.
Their well-respected lead actresses, Leanne Ong DeLiang and Karen Tan, have also done their part in trying understand the dyke culture.
And while they both admit to being completely straight, Leanne confesses: "Sometimes, when I look at beautiful women, with long hair and long legs and in beautiful dresses, I do feel a tingle in my bones."
Leanne, sweetie, that's just what we love to hear you straight women say!
(Click on the next page for the full interview with Leanne and Karen.)
Straight Girls Will Stay Straight - Until They Get Lonely
Playing opposite her is English theatrical gem Karen Tan, who will play "Lesley, the lesbian lawyer from London." We sure love the L-word, donch we?
Both are theatre veterans with their share of acclaim; Karen was even crowned Best Actress at this year's Straits Times Life! Theatre Awards. (Applause!)
Fridae gets up close and personal with these two talented thespians, who are unfortunately not lesbians - although one of them admits she may be bendable!
æ: So how many lesbian friends do each of you have? And did you go to them for research into your lesbian roles?
karen: I have more than 20 lesbian friends, but when I look at them, I find that they are no different from me: We eat the same things, and we have the same sort of problems - only they prefer women. So, I didn't feel a need to really do in-depth research into their lives. I've also been to all-girl bars and found them to be no different from other bars.
leanne: I have less than 10 lesbian friends. I have wanted to get into lesbian bars to see what they are like, but I admit - I haven't dared to.
æ: Yikes! Perhaps Fridae can organise a little excursion for you. Well, we all know you are both straight, but have any of you ever had crushes on girls?
leanne: I am currently working in Shanghai and conducting drama courses there. I came back to Singapore to do this production, then I'm flying back to Shanghai immediately. But I find that when I'm over there, I would get really lonely. Sometimes, when I look at beautiful women, with long hair and long legs and in beautiful dresses, I do feel a tingle in my bones. Shanghainese women really know how to dress. As the seasons change from winter to spring to summer, you see their wonderful clothes changing. In summer, I could suddenly see their bare backs and smooth legs, and I started to have little crushes on them.
æ: Wow! Dynamite! You definitely have gay potential!
karen: Er, should I be scared of you now?
leanne: (Soothingly) Oh no, dear, of course not.
æ: Tell us about the scenes of intimacy between the two of you in the play. What kind of dyke action are we gonna get?
karen: Well, there are some tender moments between us and we kiss, but let's not give too much away.
æ: Koh Chieng Mun, another well-known straight actress, recently played an uptight dyke in The Necessary Stage's Mardi Gras. She says that in her opinion, gay women are just not as campy and flamboyant as their gay brothers. She says: "Dykes are serious." Do you think so too?
leanne: I'm not sure how to answer this.
karen: I can see why Chieng Mun thinks that way. But it could be that when a lesbian sees a lot of gay boys looking so bright and happy and partying really hard, the instinct is for her to say: "I don't want to be like that." Perhaps, if the boys were more serious and quiet, then the girls would girlier and flirtier... But I'm sure that on ladies nights, when the girls are by themselves and there are no boys around, they can really misbehave.
æ: I'll second that! Karen, you acted in last year's English-language staging of Eleanor Wong's plays. Did straight people come up to you after the production to say they've learnt something important about the gay culture?
karen: Well, the straight audience may not have been able to identify with Ellen getting into a marriage of convenience, so to speak, with a straight man. It's because they've never been in that situation.
But the straight audience could certainly identify with the arguments between Ellen and her straight fundamentalist Christian sister - each going "I, I, I" and "you, you, you" without trying to understand one another. I think some of them learnt that love is about including yourself in another person's life without asking that person to change her life. Love is not about "repairing" another person just so that she can fit into your life.
Ticketing details: Mergers And Wills is on at Toy Factory At The Attic, 21 Tanjong Pagar Road (above Mox bar) from this Friday, Aug 6 to 22 at 7.30pm, with a matinee on Aug 21 at 2.30pm. No shows on Mondays. Tickets at $29 from Sistic (tel: 6348-5555). You can obtain a discount with your Nation ticket stub.