Yo homo-hommies! Missy "Misdemeanor" Elliot is back to rock the house with a slammin' new album that will entice your hips to make like a flygirl! More importantly, The Cookbook sees Missy "I was never fat, I was big-boned" Elliott adopting a superfly look that transforms her from hip hop hog to uber-babe.
Sexual leanings notwithstanding, The Cookbook features a concoction of 16 rap recipes and teams the best-selling female hip hop artist of all time with studio wunderkinds such as the Neptunes, Craig Brockman (Beyonce, Angie Stone), Qur'an, Warryn Campbell (Mos Def, Snoop Dogg) and to a lesser extent, frequent collaborator Timbaland who contributes only two tracks.
Despite strong support from a posse of superstar guests including Mary J. Blige ("My Struggles"), Slick Rick ("Irresistable Delicious"), M.I.A. ("Bad Man"), Fantasia Barrino ("My Man"), Ciara and Fat Man Scoop ("Lose Control"), The Cookbook fails to recreate the magical flava of hits such as "Sock It 2 Me," "Get Ur Freak On" and "Work It."
Fans familiar with the five time Grammy Award winner's earlier releases may therefore be disappointed with lacklustre tracks such as "Teary Eyed," "Partytime" and "4 My Man." Fortunately, the First Lady of Rap still manages to serve up some rather tasty treats such as the first single "Lose Control" and Ms Scary's favourite track "Remember When."
And to put some sizzle in her music-making mizzle, Missy Elliot's lyrics are raucous enough to make even the most seasoned streetwalker blush. Just take a listen to "Mommy" ("Papi havin' trouble trying to keep up the pace, mommy got
the faith I let my pussy be the bait") and "Meltdown" ("If you be my man only my man I wouldn't mind tastin' your magic stick, magic stick/If you don't cheat or sleep around ain't nothing wrong wit tastin' your magic stick").
All in all, a rather palatable album, and in Ms Scary's opinion, marred only by the over-use of high-pitched "whoos!" in one too many tracks which make The Cookbook sound as if it features escaped Howler Monkeys on permanent back-up vocals.
Scary's Selected Spins: "Irresistable Delicious," "Lose Control," "My Struggles," "Click Clack," "On & On" and "Remember When."