28 Oct 2009

Lesbian Vampire Killers

We would have liked a little more explicit girl-on-girl action in this horror comedy, but the vampires here are hot enough.

Director: Philip James Claydon

Language: English

Cast: James Corden, Matthew Horne, Paul McGann, MyAnna Buring, Silvia Colloca, Vera Filatova, Ashley Mulheron, Louise Dylan, Lucy Gaskell

Release Date: 29 October 2009

Screening: Shaw Cinemas Exclusive

Rating: M18 - Violence and Coarse Language

What a great title! Everything you need to know about this film is perfectly encapsulated in the three words, Lesbian Vampire Killers, which smartly invoke the feel of a B-grade horror-comedy. And while the vampires are as nasty as they come, they also look incredibly hot in their sexy underwear, gorgeous makeup and perfectly-coiffed hair.

The story begins centuries ago in a small English village called Cragwich where the Queen Vampire Carmilla (Silvia Corlocca) is kidnapping young maidens and turning them into her vampire lovers. When a brave knight finally catches up with her and slays her, she puts a curse on the village just before she dies – that every girl in the village would turn into a lesbian vampire on her 18th birthday.

Fast forward to the present where two regular English blokes (Matthew Horne and James Corden) are on a hiking trip to meet some girls. And meet them they do, in the village of Cragwich…

Directed by Philip James Claydon, Lesbian Vampire Killers isn’t a good movie. But it is a good bad movie – something you’d watch with friends and have a good laugh at. The whole affair is short and corny, replete with over-the-top sound effects, stylized action and lots and lots of fog. There are a few funny characters, like the expletive-spouting Vicar, and some rather bad acting.

But if B-grade’s your thing, then make a beeline for Cragwich. We promise you won’t be disappointed.