Mariah Scary: Welcome to Ms Scary's personal psychiatric ward!

Hossan Leong: What? Where? Who? How? Thanks for admitting me in here.

MS: Now then, please share with Ms Scary and her readers the root cause of your multiple personality disorder (MPD).

HL: We all put on masks, become different people everyday. In front of out friends, our family, strangers etc, we're all different. The only place we are who we really are is on the toilet bowl staring at the floor. So how like that? Who are we? The root cause? We can't identify our identity.

MS: Most interesting... and just exactly how many "popular entertainment icons" would be showcased in MPD?

HL: Well, Barry Moneylow has agreed to help pen this year's National Day Song, Whitney Whoseturn wants to come here to be rehabilitated since we don't have a drug problem in Singapore. Kenny Rogered Chicken is going to open his very own kampung chicken rice store a suburban foodcourt. Singapore offers so much to attract these foreign talents! So you can expect many more to come!

MS: Ms Scary must declare herself most impressed! (Lets loose her signature dog-whistle). Now if you don't mind, Ms Scary would like to speak to each of these "icons" and get better acquainted with them.

HL: Er, ok... I try to see if any of them are on MSN right now.

MS: Ms Whoseturn, you have recently been in the news for your "marital woes" and "erratic behaviour". Will you be living up to your reputation and canceling your public appearance at the Drama Centre at the last minute?

Whitney Whoseturn: Hai Singapore! I love you and jew and jew and jew. I've that f*%~ing s*% of a Beached Whale! Singapore is my new home! I'm gonna work on my new album here and stay clean because now that there're no more Nation parties, there'll be no more chemicals and STD! Clean and Green for life! Woo Hoo! See you at the Drama Centre!

MS: Mr Moneylow, can you confirm the rumor that you will be auditioning for Singapore's National Day Parade with renditions of your 70s (outdated) hits such as "I Write The Songs", "Mandy" and "Copacabana (At The Copa)"?

Barry Moneylow: Listen! I Wrote the Songs that made Mandy cry at the Copacabana and Even Now planes are disappearing over the Bermuda Triangle so I'll be here singing with One Voice in the darkness! And I NEVER audition. Take me or just give me my PR! Let Freedom Ring! Or I'll just stay in Las Vegas and remain Hip!

MS: Mr Kenny "The Gambler" Rogered Chicken, will you be boring, I beg your pardon, serenading the audience with your country-and-western hits?

Kenny Rogered Chicken: I miss Dolly! Her islands were really floating downstream. But yes, even on my own, I will make it here with my new and improved chicken rice recipe. I heard Singaporeans love to eat tet-tet meat. We call it breast meat. You call it tet-tet meat... or was it chicken neh-neh? But hey, with the Integrated Resorts coming up, I will know when to fold up!

MS: Your Purple Highness, you have a reputation of being highly eccentric and somewhat difficult to work with. What eccentricities of yours will be showcased at MPD?

Prints: What is eccentricity? Is it like Vivo city? Sorry lah, brudder, I from Malaysia la. My English not so good la. Young that time never go school. But at least can drawing. So I become grafik artist, forgot my name also lah, so just give me a sign la.

MS: And finally, Ms Share. Ms Scary once saw a Bravo program entitled Great Things About Being... which declared you as the number one greatest thing about being gay. What can your gay fans expect from you at MPD?

Share: I have gay fans? GASP! Oh dear I must change my image! I can't have other men looking like me, wanting me and lusting after me! Oh wait. Did you say GAY fans? Whew! Then it's fine, they'll all look ugly anyway if they try to look like me. Well my butterfly, just spread your wings and pretend to fly! I love you!

MS: Now back to Mr Leong. With so many "icons" jostling for your attention, who proved to be the most enjoyable personality for you to channel and why.

HL: I wish I could do our Great Leader, but I do want to retire peacefully in the near future and Changi is not one my preferences.

MS: Conversely, who proved to be the most challenging personality for you to channel and why.

HL: Most difficult would have to be SHARE. I don't know what it feels like to have plastic surgery.

MS: Ms Scary is most curious. MPD is written by your best friend and popular blogger Mr Miyagi. What was it like working with Mr Miyagi and did any "creative sparks" fly between the two of you?

HL: We sit down, eat prawn noodles and just talk nonsense. And NO - Mr Miyagi is NOT gay!

MS: Now finally, the question on everyone's lips: Why are has-beens such as Ms Whitney "Whatchulookinat" Whoseturn and Mr Barry Moneylow featured, while I, the newly emancipated Ms Mariah "Mimi" Scary, am not?

HL: Dahling! You will never be a has-been if you've never arrived.

MS: Talk to the hand, Mr Leong, talk to the hand!

Multiple Personalities Disorder
Directed by Selena Tan
Written by Mr Miyagi
Starring Hossan Leung
Date: 31 Jan - 10 Feb 2007
Tue - Fri, 8pm / Sat - Sun, 3pm & 8pm
Venue: Drama Centre Theatre
Address: 100 Victoria Street, Level 3, National Library
Ticketing: (Exclude Booking Fee)
Preview Shows Standard - S$40, S$28, S$18
(Preview Shows: 31 Jan'07 & 1 Feb'07, 8pm)
Standard - S$50, S$35, S$20
Please add to above price $2 Booking Fee for tickets above $20 and $1 Booking Fee for tickets below $20. Charges include GST where applicable.
Buy online at Sistic or call 6348 5555.