Fridae

Just as our fair city is gearing down after a long weekend of partying, some members may find themselves wanting to unwind in one or more of the republic's seven saunas or cruise club. Last week, Towel Club, possibly 'Singapore's newest and largest private men's spa,' opened its doors to overwhelming response.

Gay sauna; bathhouse; cruise club; men's club; men's spa, Daniel Wu by any other name will still be a hunk du jour. To have seven gay saunas in any other city will be nothing to crow about but to have such a number sprouting in our petite garden city is quite a phenomenon. Their numbers say a lot about where most gay Singaporean men head to when they want some hot action in a hot tropical city.

However, for the uninitiated, the virgin foray into the steamy and dark rooms can be intimidating enough for them to turn on their heels at the entrance. But fret not, for the kind folks at Fridae have compiled a list of tips to make your entrance as painless as possible.

TIP 1: Do your homework
Many sauna virgins will inevitably face the predicament of choosing which lucky men's club he'll make his debut in. To save you from the headaches and possibly a wasted trip, do yourself a favor and consult the net before you assault the club. Several online gay resource websites such as *ahem* Fridae offer invaluable information on the smorgasbord of gay saunas. Some of these clubs even have websites of their own to give you a better idea of what they are all about. Helpful details like rates, facilities, location and most importantly clientele profile are readily available for your perusal. With so much knowledge at hand, you'll no doubt be able to find one that suits your budget and preference.

TIP 2: Come undone
In case you don't already know, you are expected to ditch all your clothes at the door and strut your stuff in a towel. A trip to a gay sauna is not a night out with the boys where you try to outshine each other with your designer threads. So leave your Armani's, shelve your Prada's and go in your char kway teow (a local dish of fried flat noodles) hawker singlet and parachute shorts. No one will see them and you'll save on the dry cleaning.

TIP 3: Know what you are getting yourself into
Most gay saunas are divided into several areas. Some areas are strictly for sex only while some are for chilling out and other recreational purposes. It's best if someone is able to orientate you on your first trip, failing which, you can always count on the friendly staff for essential information on where to find what. If you're too shy to ask, just imagine that you are asking for directions to the gents in a restaurant where everyone only wears a towel on their waist.

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TIP 4: Stick to your goals
Before you step out of the locker room, remind yourself why you are there. If you are picky about whom you want to do it with or perhaps (heaven forbids) want to look for someone to have a meaningful relationship with, hang around the lounge areas or other brighter lit areas where conventional cruising rules prevail to access potential candidates. If pure unadulterated bump and grind is all you want, save everyone's time and head straight to the dark rooms and get busy.

TIP 5: Baby, talk is cheap
Trust me on this, once in the darkroom, zip the lip. Nobody cares if you are a fabulous conversationalist or if you have a voice that melts butter. Everyone there is eager for one thing only. No wooing, flirty exchanges or witty dialogue is required. When one is wagging his bottom or willy at you, one doesn't care if they know next to nothing about you.

TIP 6: Mind your body language
Since talk is almost non-existent in the rooms, how will you know if you are welcomed to engage in a little pelvic action with others in the room? Simply observe what the other party's body is telling you. Approach your target slowly but purposefully and proceed with a touch or a caress to signal your interest. If he doesn't resist, hop on the wagon and enjoy the ride. If he pushes your hand away, retreat and approach another target. And for goodness sake, if a door is closed, don't attempt to open it. It's closed for a reason.

TIP 6: Never go out in the rain without a raincoat
Your mama was on to something when she said that. As dark rooms are a place for anonymous sex, you can hardly see what your hump buddies look like, much less know anything about their sexual history. Most if not all gay saunas provide complimentary condoms for your own protection. Make full use of them. Your mama will be proud of you.

TIP 7: Don't mind your P's & Q's
The dark room is probably the only place where you can throw all verbal formalities out of the window. No one expects you to thank them after a mind-blowing session with them. What do you expect them to say to you? "You're most welcome, please come again (pun not intended)?" No one is providing anyone any service. Everyone is there to satisfy each other's primal sexual urges. Get on, get off and move on. It's that simple.