Fridae

United Nation (UN) should enact..... pls protect weak minority.

Im an indonesian born Chinese and gay. Im a super minority within minority in term of my existance here, but im not weeping for a US residency. Why should Anton Tanumihardja get special deal by the us gov'nt for being gay, and has recently had an American partner. I care less if he ought to get one per se, but i totally dont agree with the words that he would..." face a constant threat of violence" if returned to Indonesia because he is gay...." well i ve been back living in Indonesia since 2003...everything is fine for us and thriving...we minght not be the mecaa of gay like sf but we manage to have our community grows. Thus, i cant comprehend his defense for not going back.

+ he has to self ponder; what was his first purpose coming to US at the beginning. If he knew there was no chance to marry a guy to get a pr, why forces to do it so. If he knew his purpose was to work illegaly (like most ppl came to the US circa '99 - 05) he had cleraly known that what he s doing is wrong...

Im not trying to prosecute him.lets face it he's taking a chance in a dark water (if im quoting a correct saying)...

Ps: most indonesians who are eligible to get a US visa will one. Ppl who use that visa for wrong purposes such as visitor visa for work ileegally are the ones who gave us bad names.

Go extradite...its a free ride anyway

I WOULD LIKE TO ADD MY FULL SUPPORT FOR ANTON AND BRIAN'S CASE

WE ARE THINKING OF YOU AT THIS DIFFICULT TIME AND HOPING THAT THE USA IMMIGRATION WILL RESPECT YOUR RIGHTS

GOOD LUCK TO YOU BOTH

KISSES

GAVIN

Badzmr, your posts are insensitive and don't even address the problem of couples being separated because of citizen status.

I've personally seen a couple (who were together almost 3 years) split because of this. It is sad and shouldn't happen.

Now go take a sensitivity class. Since your parents obviously didn't teach you any.

sometimes we have to look at it from various angles and be objective and all opinions should be respected..after all the immigration dept are not set up to be sensitive :-) . If you want to work..then go through the legal way , nobody should be above the law, hetero or homo. ....while indeed it is sad that you have seen a couple split because of this ..I have heard from my frens that there are those who succeeded in getting PR etc etc for their bf who came from Asia and after that got dumped..thats sad too...so there are two sides to the coin.

indeed I agree that using the term " would face a constant threat of violence" is a bit exaggerated unless you publicly declare you are gay. which I believe in many Western countries or cities other than the more liberal ones, it would be frowned upon and subjected to violence as well :-) .

my uncle is gay and he was deported from the US few years back. since he was using a tourist visa and stay 3 years in the US doing nothing. then he was appeal for student visa and yet he didnt study and live there for sometimes, now he is banned from the US.

I dont mean anything bad, but none get deported without any reasons.

Why is the U.S. still in the 19th century...?

Most progressive western countries have had gay partner migration arrangements for many years. Likewise, most progressive western countries have also allowed openly gay men and lesbians to serve in their respective military services.

Here in Australia "overseas gay partner migration" arrangements have existed for at least 20 years. The rules are strict but fair. Permanent Residency applications made under these provisions are almost always successful... PROVIDED the couple concerned can prove a loving and caring relationship over a period of time, and can also prove having lived together for at least 12 months. And our military has allowed gays to serve openly for many, many years.

Many other progressive Western countries have similar, although varying, arrangements.

i totally agree with Badzmr!

Ah, one of the reasons I no longer live in the USA. (Plus, Australia rocks my freakin' socks off.) But I can understand the pain of being in a bi-national relationship since I spent most of my 20s being in one. It's hard not being able to stay with your partner longer than 3 or 6 months at a time. It also gets super expensive.

Having known that and the USA's immigration laws, the Indonesian guy should have known that staying isn't an option - in love or not. Being in love, with the current immigration laws in place, doesn't exempt the fact that the US doesn't recognize same-sex marriages/civil unions/etc at a national level. As far as those relationships aren't considered "real" relationships, it is going to stay that way.

Had I the opportunity to bring my partner at the time to the USA to stay, I would have done it.

Will things change? Perhaps. I just don't see it changing for a long time. If it DOES, that would be awesome.

(Oh, and I am sure the Republicans will get full run of the country in 2012 so there won't be much progress of anything and what few rights are there will get taken away. It's the Republican way!)

Seven years ago I was faced with a similar problem when I wanted to bring my Vietnamese BF to Canada. I was told by Immigration not to "waste my time" or be prepared to spend a lot of money. After my fifth trip to Vietnam to see him I decided that if he couldn't come to me then I would go to him. When I returned to Canada, I went to school and studied to teach English as a second language. In 2006 I returned to Vietnam to live so I could be with him. Nearly five years have past and I'm still here. I guess my point is: if they really want to be together, there's always a way to do. My (ex) BF? ...... he now lives in America.

So it seems some people here are saying that said guy should already know the laws -- nevermind they are unequal towards same-sex and opposite-sex couples -- accept it for what it is, stop fighting and leave it at that. You know you can always count on the gay community to be supportive.

Those who denied that the gays in Indonesia are not discriminated are liars!! and denial to the truth. Why? about last year, there was an international event that was held in Surabaya, Indonesia. The participants were from surrounding Asian countries. IT WAS FILMED. YES! FRIDAE POSTED THE CLIP where some of the chinese participants were interviewed. People from The fundamentalist religious group were surrounding the hotel where these people were staying and where the meeting was going to be held. They had to cancel it and they had to secretly moved to other hotel to stay and left the country.

So, those of you who doesn't have the empathy to these couple seekinga revised decision, just shut the funk up! It's not about you!.. It's about the story of a couple of people who wants to be together. Aside from Anton's case, It's about an American (the white guy) who had to consider leaving his country (a systematic deportation to the American himself) to be with the person he loves. It's about the gay americans fighting for equal rights, self worth, and happines that you haters can only dream about. So, You, the self-centered, hollow narcicists are not the object of these struggle. So, I would appreciate it if you just say something positive (from learning some positive experience from this story) or just shut the funk up!... Seriously, it's not about you.

one must always be suspicious of the intentions of foriegners gay or straight who seek relationships in places like Australia, Europe, Canada and the USA..they are often manipulative and only after one thing sucking some poor wretch in on the pretence of 'loving them' so as to try get permanent residency that way, Gays in Indonesia seem to fare ok they arn't Iran, Uganda or Saudi Arabia by a long shot

"one must always be suspicious of the intentions of foriegners gay...they are often manipulative and only after one thing sucking some poor wretch in on the pretence of 'loving them' ... etc"...hahaha..you should know bro ;)

To appropriately debate this issue, I think you actually have to take this situation OUT of context. It doesn't matter if you like the person, if he can earn a green card (e.g. through the workplace), or if he can get refugee status. The point is that heterosexual couples are allowed to do this while homosexual couples are not. Opponents of gay marriage try to point out that civil unions are a 'separate but equal' situation, we all know how those sorts of things have worked out in the past, and in fact this is NOT equal.

another deliciously failed attempt by faceless contributor 'kumabro_oz' at being clever or facetious, put us all out of your misery you really should just lay down and die 'bro' just make your failed misspent life being over official

no dramas.. life will go on
they will find another partner

Badzmr n aztlan_oz n kumabro_oz...don't u think it is a bit cruel?

Badzmr n aztlan_oz n kumabro_oz...don't u think it is a bit cruel?

ENUF for those pic-less profiles and uneducated ppl attacking me in personal level.

I have a right to comment and argue here and see the issue in different angles.

PPL who cant take my view GO REBUT me stop telling my parents and mouth to shut.

If you cant see different opinions in different angles maybe u should live alone in your own island. Pls go to college and open up your mind.

The US dont recognize same-sex marrigaes. thus, how can a couple ask for a green card though spouse-support immigration if they arent married yet in the eyes of the gov't???? Maybe they should address the 1st problem before going to the 2nd one.

I didnt close my eyes for the Surabaya event 2-3 years ago. Yet, do u know that Indonesia is a very kind of uptight country that old-thinkings and hundres-year-old culture rein supreme here? How can a gay meeting could be held in a country like tat. it like trying to hv a gay pride parade in Saudi Arabia.

Different culture has different way of life. Just because a gay life in your countries are happening , fun, so gay, doesnt mean that your fun should be applied here. Gay life here isnt "western std perfect" but we embrace it. for those Indonesians dont agree, they are free to leave the country but dont ever say there is something wrong with my country.

Yes, that's true for saying there's always way to do. I believe that Love knows no boundaries. You gotta work together to make it happen, either this or that way. But hey, under the name of law, you can't work that way out illegally. Love can make people blind but think smart and work smart.

American dream is something up in the air, do most Asian people think that they can only be happy if they can get there? After all, if you can't find your true love, then no matter where you are you still feel unhappy at times.

I do have sympathy for those people in question, but you did it and you gotta accept it.

yea, they fight for his and then he'll kick his new found Caucasian partner out once he settled down in that country because he didn't need him anymore.
Sorry if this sounded rude, but i truly know how most Indonesian locales motives for dating Western people. It's for the better living.
Been talked with whole lots of them of how they're tricks this poor Westerns genuine feelings for their own greed and kick them out once they found another. I pity them for that, honestly!

I am for once questions his sincerity. I am Chinese, totally out gay man and lives in the very city, Jakarta, Indonesia.
And didn't meet such violence addressed by this guy, even when i kissed in public.
Other than discrimination by locales because i am Chinese and them locales think we stole their money away of course. We never forgot 1997-1998 riot where so many Chinese fled because we got tortured so much because of their ill behaviors.

I am alive and well, my Moslem friends can accept me for who i am,
so it's such a big lie about meeting constant threat of violence.
Instead, i must say Indonesia, except for Aceh province, is the most tolerant Moslem country with LGBT.
We won't get imprisoned for being a gay or lesbian down here unlike in Malaysia or Middle East or African countries. There's no law about it. In fact some tribes in Indonesia have practiced sodomy and fellatio between men as sign of maturity for many generations already and still going. It' been part of our culture here.

What you have been read about these extreme swapping by extremist, come now, that's happen everywhere.
Much like the U.S that having KKK and that red neck-ish church, Westboro Baptist. Even in countries that already legalize civil partnership, like Canada and U.K, discrimination against gays are still going on. Cos haters gonna hate.

If his home town is bad, they could always live on another province of the country that are more open with diversity, say Jakarta, Bandung or Bali.

If they love each other genuinely, any places just don't matter.
Seriously.

besides, it's not like we didn't know how much worse is discrimination against gay in the USA.
How many teens that committing suicides because felt suppressed of bullies because of their sexuality. And how much older men there still choose to be in the closet just to fit in with society. So it's a bit odd for him to fight for his will to stay to avoid violence for being gay in his home country, while the country he fight for the rights to live in is much worse. It's just seems like, escaping from crocodile's swamp and fall into lion's pit.

and that's my 2 cents.

You got me lost here totally .. indonesian guy has american partner and he is being deported ??? Either the partner is an idiot or has not used enough resources. On the other hand we all know "only in america" chapter, this is country where law does exist only on paper and it is streched and interpreted to the individual needs of officer of the law. Though Australia is far from being perfect, to get PR on same sex relationship grounds is much easier then heterosexual relationship grounds. What is so called "GLBT lobby" done about the case ?? I guess nothing ...

ThayT@11 -- I'm at a loss for words. Thank you for sharing your story.

I am guessing that Mr. Anderson is being used. This was done to me.
Whilst, Indonesia is Muslim, it is not as extreme as Malaysia. Protocol instructs the Dept. of Immigration and Naturalization that proof must be rendered to convince them that the Indonesian fellow would be persecuted upon return. Sad story. Either way it goes, I know how it ends: Mr Anderson will lose his partner.

The US government does not extend immigration priveleges to same sex couples, unlike Canada, Australia and New Zealand. I have a friend who was in a long distance relationship with a US citizen and when my friend's tourist visa was revoked, he was no longer able to visit his partner in the U.S. The relationship ended as well.

There were A LOT of gay in Indonesia do as what this Anton did. Get into some country illegally and find some support from local boyfriend so they can stay at that country.

I am not saying every asian gay that got caught by imigration must be sharing the same story . Probably this Anton had was something different. something more sincere perhaps

But i've seen way too many people that I know do exactly the same as what he did. Some got lucky, and get support from their boyfriend . Some got unlucky and sent back to Indonesia just like what happen to this anton. Some got even luckier get married with their boyfriend (that's why most of them aiming netherland).

Indonesian is not Uganda thats for sure. So there no such thing as violence threat or whatever just because you're being gay in indonesia.

I beg you guys to look into this case from different perspective cause you don't know it all. Us, who live in Indonesia and share story with lots of people who did the same thing as this Anton did, we know it more. It's not that we don't feel sorry for their relationship. Its just we cant help but judge this guy as the same with hundreds of other local gay that trying to make it on other countries by pulling the exactly the same scheme

Such poor grammar - "It also, his lawyer argues in a request currently before the Board of Immigration Appeals (BIA) to reopen his deportation case, would mean that Tanumihardja "would face a constant threat of violence" if returned to Indonesia because he is gay."

He is not being deported because he is gay - as the poor grammar indicates. He is being deported because apparently he is in the U.S. without having followed the proper legal procedure.

I empathize with him and his partner, but not the journalist that forgets to follow basic rules of grammar.

Is there's a learn ? then How should I ? coz ...... maybe......

i agree with Russlush3. the real issue here is about equal marriage. there are a lot of cases like theirs. this one is worth to consider: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aacoDgWrlFs&feature=related

and i also agree with Kuman10127 on the poor grammar, but i think it is not the journalist. it is the lawyer who uses rusty argument. they certainly need to get a new lawyer.

Mr. Badzmr,

Your comments are extremely idealist, ignorant, and insensitive at best. One must understands the struggle of gay rights, injustice, and inequality faced by gay individuals and same sex couples.

First of all, by no means the stipulated statement "..face a constant threat of violance.." is aimed at attacking the gay life style and culture of another (your) country. I, myself was born in Indonesia. These are words that were set upon by the U.S. immigration law for a petition based on asylum which is one of the few criterions allowed to be eligible for a petition for immigration. As you know currently in the U.S., same sex partner cannot sponsor their partner for immigration purposes UNLIKE heterosexual couple. In order to even send a petition, it must first meet one of the criterions, and thus, asylum along with its provisions would be the closest for gay couples. You must understand that laws are being tried all the time in court of law in order to create, change public policy and improve society as a whole. This is the key to gay rights movement. Unless we change the law, we cannot be equal and in order to change the law we must challenge them in court within the given initial boundary even though they may not 100% fit (asylum does not fit marriage equality).

Second of all, just because Mr. Anton T. came on a student visa with the purpose to study and later fell in love with another person of the same sex, does not mean that he is wrong. Do you really think that if the law provides him and his partner to be married and be equal with heterosexual couples that he would choose to stay as illegal? Life is more complex than mathematical summation and the logic itself. You are missing the point here by saying Mr. Anton T. is definitely in the wrong side. Wrong is a very subjective term and yet you insist on being objective "by looking at all angles". Well, look at this, the law in the U.S. currently does not provide all of its citizens with equal rights yet when it comes to taking from the citizens, gay individuals pay the same portion of taxes and contribute the same as a member of the society according to their professions. Equal tax currently in the U.S. does not equal rights.

Last, I would agree with your statement that different culture has different way of life. However, we are all human being born with the same set of basic needs and abilities. One of the is to love and to be loved by the person we choose. There is no differences about this no matter where and what generation you live. So, please sir, stop being ignorant and telling others to go to college. As I see it you could use some yourself.