Openly gay author and pastor Rev. Oyoung Wen Feng, who legally married his partner Phineas Newborn III on Aug 31 – Malaysia's Independence Day – last year in New York, hosted a wedding banquet in downtown Kuala Lumpur last Saturday.
News of Malaysia-born Oyoung's marriage made the headlines in his home country and internationally last year as did the banquet on Aug 4 with a leading local Chinese-language newspaper Sinchew showing a 3-minute news video on its Internet channel on Youtube.
Last year, the New York-based pastor announced and affirmed his intention to hold a wedding banquet in Malaysia this year despite criticism by a Malaysian politician. "I believe, I deserve at least this very right to share my joy with my friends by dining together, even in Malaysia," said Oyoung who has mainly lived in the US since 1998 although he returns to regularly to Malaysia and other Asian countries to speak at churches and at secular events.
In an email to Fridae, Rev. Oyoung, whose real name is Ngeo Boon Lin, acknowledged that his mother’s attendance at the dinner "meant a lot" to him.
Held at a Chinese restaurant Berjaya Time Square, the dinner was attended by some 250 people including his aunts and cousins as well as friends from Malaysia, Singapore, Hong Kong, Taiwan and the US where the couple now lives.
The 42-year-old former newspaper columnist "came out" as gay publicly in 2006 and says it’s important to him that he didn’t marry in secret despite being subjected to criticism by the public and Malaysian politicians.
He says he hopes his wedding “inspires others to do the same.”
He told Fridae: “It stimulates their imaginations, it helps people to understand if we are not afraid, we can live our lives authentically, because of fear, we can be our worst enemies. More often than not, we defeat ourselves way before others attack us.
“It helps straight people realise our love is not a shame and we are not guilty of our love. If we keep it as a secret, like it or not, people would assume that we are ashamed of ourselves. I want to inspire others, not only on love matters, but on everything we do. If we are not afraid, we can dream the impossible dreams. We are in fact more powerful than we think we are!”
The pair is now in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam on their honeymoon. "I am having my honeymoon in Vietnam because I believe Vietnam will be the first country in Southeast Asia to legalise gay marriage," he added.
When asked if he plans to continue living in the US or return to Malaysia, he said he is “planning to come back to Asia, and seeking opportunities to work in Asia, and (his) partner knows very well that (his) heart is in Asia.”
He says he has spent at least three months a year for the past three years travelling between Malaysia, Singapore, Hong Kong, Taiwan and China on lecture tours. He is scheduled to appear/speak at a Popular book store in Kuching on Aug 9 (Thu) and 10 (Fri), Good Samaritan Metropolitan Community Church (GSMCC) on Aug 12 (Sun), Taipei (dates to be confirmed), BookFest at KLCC at 2pm on Aug 18, and Free Community Church Singapore and a book launch at Prologue Ion Orchard on Aug 19.
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Reader's Comments
I think we can have any number of different opinions as to whether or not all this is a good thing for this part of the world.
The question of whether the couple could have made better use of the money spent on the wedding dinner is I think not very moot. The wedding dinner could very well have been self-financing because most guests (the Chinese ones anyway) would have come with a hongbao of an appropriate sum. Anyway, they've chosen to put their money/effort into what they've chosen to put their money/effort into. The international marketplace of good causes is huge.
Congrats and a toast to Oyoung and Phineas for having the courage and for showing all the gay and lesbians youths that it can be done!
I like your comment on Oyoung's wedding. At least it make one to think the possible REAL intention of Oyoung.......
I like your comment on Oyoung's wedding. At least it make one to think the possible REAL intention of Oyoung.......
So American , doing all the publicity shit just to sell some books or sell something that will benefit themselves.
The wedding is a joke , freaks , why not just keep it private and stop making fools of themselves...
Freaks ....
If they get publicity they deserved it not of Yours.
We LGBT here to bless each other in other to
have a better life! Many star8
have been look down on us and tease us but
LGBT is the most Caring kind.
We should make this world a better life for all.
Hopefully, one day it will be my turn;
yet to find a sincere and honest partner.
All the very best.
It is one thing to not want a wedding banquet of this nature for ourselves... another thing entirely to conjecture that it is 'psychosis' for others to want this.
http://www.thubtenchodron.org/DailyLifeDharma/speaking_of_the_faults_of_others.html
In the youtube clip above, Ouyang is explicitly conscious about the political implications of his banquet, and about the unprecedented joy he has in celebrating this with his elderly family and his friends, and the potential this publicity can have in changing hearts and minds of others. So yes: this is his explicit political message.
Whether we agree with his message or not is another point entirely, but it is hard to fault him by suggesting that he is being sneaky, when he is actually quite transparent about his multiple motivations.
What's clear is that there is a lot of pain here:
Not all of us have the freedom, the wealth, the courage, or the family support to celebrate our love or our relationships like Ouyang has. So let us continue to support one another as we continue to build a world where this is more and more possible.
You wrote: "[I] suspect he's also taken on board what seems to me to be a very American habit of blurring the boundaries between your personal life (and your personality) and whatever ideologies or causes you happen to espouse. I think this is also a trait of American-style evangelical Christianity. In short, he's trying to turn aspects of his life into so many political/ideological statements. He's probably also trying to export US-style gay activism. "
and
"I think we can have any number of different opinions as to whether or not all this is a good thing for this part of the world."
Really appreciate your thoughts there. :)
I still stand by my personal view : This kind of hype and publicity makes the whole thing a ridiculous public spectacle and a sitting duck for the Billy Grahams or Mitt Romneys of mainstream society to justify drawing their weapons and fire at will. It does NO good whatsoever for HUMANITY at large (NOT just the LGBT community) and is, obviously, an attempt to make a political statement in this part of the world that is NOT YET ready to embrace or celebrate the concept of gay marriage.
This is just my personal view, nenihs84, and I'm entitled to express it as much as you and the rest of those who support your views are. So, just leave it at that and end your cyber bullying. It's neither becoming nor gentlemanly nor very effective in making someone else see things your way.
anyway, congrats!
I'm not sure how what I said or how I said it was cyberbullying?
Peace
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/duty_calls.png
Clearly there are segments of society here which feel uncomfortable with this sort of thing - perhaps not so much with 'gay rights' as such as with some flamboyant half-insider half-outsider coming here and pulling off such an in your face stunt.
At the end of the day, I think this will be remembered as but a minor blip in the struggle of the gay community here for fairness and acceptance. I have far more respect for the people who run the seksualiti merdeka movement, and pink triangle. These are people who are in touch with what's happening on the ground, and who are doing concrete and useful things, working for change from within.
I agree with people here who find Ouyang's gesture somewhat tasteless. I have no issue with the couple getting married and all and wanting to celebrate their union with family and friends here or anywhere else. But turning this whole thing into a publicity stunt and presuming to be the voice of the gay commmunity here is a bit much.
In my personal view, your statement, "I have no issue with the couple getting married and all and wanting to celebrate their union with family and friends here or anywhere else. But turning this whole thing into a publicity stunt and presuming to be the voice of the gay commmunity here is a bit much", is absolutely spot on!
The LGBT people who work towards change from within are indeed the unsung heroes of our community. They absolutely do not need public spectacles like this to jeopardise years upon years of hard work and effort. This sort of public display, to me, reeks of some personal, political agenda that Ouyang, perhaps, harbours but, whatever the motivation behind it, it has, in my view, made the LGBT community in this part of the world a sitting duck for religious fundamentalists and right-wing governments to make a meal out of.
Gay people do not need to conform to such "straight world " practices do we ? .... Ild rather have tax benefits and other more important recognition than such meaningless / pointless gestures.
The pastor felt it meaningful that his mother and family was there.... Talk about selfish and the need for being a centre of attraction .
The mother most likely had no choice but choose to be there after all it's the son ...but it's another matter if she actually agrees with this so called marriage to begin with....being most likely a traditionalist herself.
This pastor ought to spend his time evangelizing to the many bigots in his holy domain in his adopted homeland instead of spreading his nonsense in Asia ( + Vietnam ) ....or are those people in the USA not listening to him ??
This has nothing to do with glbt movement in Asia ...it's to do with his personal agenda and the need for recognition in a world ie his world which is more than likely to be hostile towards him.
I wonder should this "MARRIAGE" break up will there be another banquet held in it's honour ?
freaks .
If you don't have any for yourself , at least spare a thought to others .
Some disingenuous trolling going on here, unless someone at Fridae is just trying to stir up debate ;)
That's Lena Horne , so maybe this reverend pastor " oyoung " or what ever his real name is ....did marry a woman after all......
It's not a personal attack neither was it meant to be snide ...that wasn't my intention .
I really do think he looks like Lena Horne !
Or at the very least a very close resemblance ....
I honestly think so.
Malaysia like all other country has over10% gays
These hateful religious freaks better get that in thier head
Malaysia like all other country has over10% gays
These hateful religious freaks better get that in thier head
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