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5 Feb 2008

Ah Long Pte Ltd

Original Title: Laoshi Jia Laoda

Director: Jack Neo

Language: Mandarin with English and Chinese subtitles

Starring: Fann Wong, Mark Lee

Release: 2008-02-05

You know you're watching bad comedy when the supposedly funny parts have to be punctuated by cheesy comic music. And Jack Neo's latest movie Ah Long Pte Ltd has all the hallmarks of a lousy comedy save for the fake laugh track which you find in our worst sitcoms.

Possibly the worst entry in Jack Neo's resume, Ah Long Pte Ltd stars Singapore's top actress Fann Wong as the new female boss of a criminal gang, formerly headed by Richard Low. Seeing the need to modernize their practices, Fann turns gang violence on its head by cultivating a softer, gentler, more professional approach to doing business.

Naturally, most of the triad members oppose her "non-violent" ways of carrying out criminal activities, accusing her of destroying the triad's proud and long-held traditions. But little by little, they come on her side. Helping her is Mark Lee, an effeminate dance instructor who also happens to be her future husband...

We don't know about you, but we actually find the movie's premise sorta appealing. However, execution is everything when it comes to movies. And in the case of Ah Long Pte Ltd, the execution is rather atrocious. Not only do the jokes suck, the movie steals so many ideas from the Korean action-comedy franchise My Wife is a Gangster, you wonder if Jack Neo has temporarily turned Singapore's film industry into the new Bollywood (where filmmakers unabashedly steal ideas from other films).

Among the actors, only Richard Low delivers a lively and likeable performance. Fann Wong's tough-on-the-outside-but-soft-on-the-inside mafia boss feels fake and forced, while Mark Lee's mimicry of effeminate men is likely to offend legions of queers with its cheap jokes and stereotypes.
Verdict: Two ang pows out of five. The worst movie of the festive season.

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