Fridae

One gentle dab of blusher on each cheekbone was what Marilyn Tan Kok Seng needed to complete his full works. Now he was certain he looked perfect. Dressed in a black chiffon blouse which draped naturally over the contours of his torso, half-revealing the B cup black frilly bra, and immaculately matched black A-line skirt which showcased his slim slender figure picturesquely, Marilyn sashayed into the examination room.

"I am a woman trapped in a man's body," she whispered in a nasal tone trying hard not to speak too loudly lest it heightened the baritone notes coming from his mouth, a cursed thing that resulted from his pubertal change six years ago.

The sweet young doctor hurriedly but skillfully executed the sequence of examination, including checking the 'privates'.

"O.K. There is nothing physically wrong with you. I have to send you to be seen by my colleague, a psychiatric medical officer who will need to ask you more questions pertaining to your gender identity. After that, the doctor will give you an appointment to see the Army Psychiatrist."

Marilyn heaved a sigh of relief. This was half a battle won. Now she would need to convince the Psychiatrist that she is a woman and then life would not be so difficult in the Army. Countless of sisters have gone through this grueling procedure and she has had varied opinions on what she should say or wear or how she should behave.

"You must act sweet lah and dress like a decent school girl so that the psychiatrist will excuse you from tough training," Tiffany suggested.

"No! You must have that bad-girl image, with low cut blouse and boops overflowing so that they will not want you to be involved in in-camp training as you are too great a temptation for the men," quipped Catherine.

Being gay in the Army is by no means an easy task. Depending on whether you are the butch or the effeminate type, there is a whole gamut of emotions to be experienced. For some, the emotional turmoil can be intolerable - the fear of exposing oneself to many men at one go in a common shower is certainly ludicrous and impossible, especially if you happen to have half developed breasts. But then again, if you are butch and well endowed, the whole bathing experience is a tantalizing feast for the eye and the mind where perhaps the only fear is that of inability to camouflage an uprising cock-up.

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Whether you are Mary of John, or Peter of Jane, what you are is certainly going to affect your life in the Army. If you are Peter or John, nature has bestowed on you the ability to be a MAN. Hence if you have no other medical disabilities, chances are that you are not going to disclose that you are gay as it is going to be an indelible mark in your life. Besides, since you are the macho type, you are going to be treated just like any other normally performing male. Also going through the normal discourse of the Army is likely to be a fun and enjoyable time for you. You can really enjoy the tremendous male company at its prime and it is not unheard of to get hitched with some other fellow camp mates. But if you are Mary of Jane, life is likely to be different and perhaps difficult for you in the Army.

If you are not already on your way to becoming a full fledge Mary or Jane, then it is likely you would have to go through a modified form of military training with a subsequent non-combat vocation. Special bathing privileges may be requested but always remember to be polite about it. There is always your platoon commander to turn to for help or even your camp Medical Officer in requesting for certain exemptions if you feel it is beyond your ability to accomplish these tasks.

If you have already gone under the knife or are on your way there, then it is in all likelihood for you to be exempted from the Army. Congratulations! Go on in life and enjoy yourself and do us proud.

For those of you out there who are still not sure what is the best path for you, remember the wise words of one female psychiatrist who advises 'Be proud of yourself! Be proud of who you are.' Yes! Whether you confess or not and join the ranks of official 302 (which incidentally is the disease code for homosexuality in the International Classification of Diseases), your sexual orientation is unlikely to change.

If you can forsee yourself as being gay and happy in the Army, then you certainly can function like any other males in the military. However if you feel your sexual identity impedes your ability to perform like the other males in the military, then you need to discuss this problem with the Army Doctor; in other words, welcome to club 302. If at any time you cannot reconcile your sexual orientation while in the Army, seek help or do drop us a line and we will try to advise you accordingly.

Remember, be gay, be happy! All the way!