Fridae

sad and tragic...hope this will not fuel the haters out there...

The reason why such torment can still be felt by homosexual people of Christian beliefs is because of the steadfast refusal of the Church to admit the natural and obvious conflation of being homosexual with doing homosexual things.
The Church still insists "love the sinner, but hate the sin", as if there were some kind of essential difference between being gay and having gay thoughts (like guys having feelings for guys) and doing gay things (like men having sex with men) (I mean, why would you if you WEREn't gay in the first place). This is ontology versus theology.
This arbitrary separation of the "soul" from the "body", this sentence of isolation and alienation from the body that the Church imposes on its gay people is an utterly cruel act and, in my opinion, directly responsible for tragic stories such as the one above. I could recount many others.

it makes ppl sad when someone nice died just because of his sexual preference... really cant accept it! Our societies around the world shall have more tolerance towards gays!

Hmmmm.. very sad indeed

Very sad but his choice.

Sorry had some experience with suicide (3 friends) and its very sad but also a decision.

Its the people left behind that suffer. It seems he was in torment with himself and his beliefs, not outside hatred.

suicide for me is not a good decision, even i past through so many sad moment, yes i even thought of suicide, i chose to not to kill myself, because if you kill yourself, everything in life become dull.... , i considered many things thats why i didnt suicide....



what a sad decision had made!!

i'm a christian ..and i hv no problem being gay..i attending a gay church in malaysia now...for the past 2 years:P

why put the word - married - in quotes? it makes their union seem illegitimate. they were legally married weren't they?

Yes Thomas and I are going to the same gay-friendly church in Kuala Lumpur. I would encourage you to see the new film Prayers for Bobby which is a powerful story about how the suicide of a young Christian gay man impacted the family and changed their entire stand on the issue of homosexuality. God loves gay people. Just as it is natural for straight people to live their lives the "straight" way, so it is natural for gay people to live their lives the gay way. To live otherwise would be unnatural and unwholesome. A good tree naturally bears good fruit. So a gay person who loves another person of the same sex does it out of the depths of his inner being. If he is a good person, all he does is good. If I can love another man, why can't God? Am I more loving or better than God?

It always amuses me that they claim to be a religion of love but when in the course of history have shown themselves persistently as harbingers of death and war... all in the name of their deity.

They must be really happy and proud that because of their intense and immense doctrine of distorted set of values, have pushed more than one gay person to their deaths.

this is what we called IQ zero.. nonsense and just pathetic, to kill yourself... there's just so much things to do... why stop it?

THIS is the result of the mainstream christian church (and same for any monothiestic religion)...and for gays who lie to themself by not being out and open (i.e. "Im bisexual"). If he exited the church and came out, he would still be alive.

A lesson from this sad story is that religion reduces your intelligence and might be life-threatening. Read Richard Dawkin's God Delusion book and free yourself from these nonsenses.

A sad story indeed. I am a practicing Christian and in my case, it was my Christian faith that gave me the strength to accept that I am gay and continues to sustain me daily today in any time of struggle or adversity.
I am lucky to have never felt anything but love and tolerance in any of the churches I have attended in my life.
I understand that some falsely manipulate The Word and use it for their own devices, but most churches embrace and love those that come to them.

i have lesbian friends who were told to leave the church they were attending when the church found out they were homosexual. Mad. Thank Buddha my Buddhist centre welcomes me with open arms and rainbows!

The saddest thing is that by committing suicide he went against one of the most fundamental teachings of his church: not to take his life. Yet his suffering was strong enough to confuse his beliefs on this point.

Misleading headline "Elton John's lover" - that should be "A former lover of Elton John". Everybody knows he's "married" now, this sounds like he was cheating. Disrespectful.

his family & friends should have sought help before he did the unthinkable.

The Church has always been known to use the Bible to inflict guilt on its member and this become its means of controlling the mind and emotion of their believers.

I was victim to the church's weapon of guilt and suffered a breakdown. I had three years of psychiatric therapy before I finally was able to believe that my gay sexuality is a gift from God and I have nothing to feel guilty about.

I recommend that gay christians open themselves to other interpretations of traditional scriptures that prohibits homosexuality. The Bible has suffered many inaccurate translations and editing by the "Church and the Church has never shown complete integrity in their interpretation of the Bible.

www.trevorproject.com

although i am a jew i would go to church with thomas and fipkt and kuman... they represent the new face of cool gay christians who are at ease with everything

watch Prayers for Bobby or read the book, it was filmed in Royal Oak Michigan (made to look like in Castro San Fran)

The title make me think that his present lover just commits suicide.

Again, I believe in US, too has gay friendly churches but who has the truth right to say on behalf on god?

I always believe if you do think you say god's word, show and prove it not just say it.

You pursuit yr own happiness, health and fortune not someone else.

agreed with lothda reply 17. The headline is misleading and disrespectful.

i was & still in the delimma of being a christian and gay too. i can understand how tremendous the pressure he had. its easier said than done. we just need a lot of support from friends and family to go through this. esp we dont have alot of gay friendly church here.

For Christianity, read hypocracy. The church clergy and leadership is full of gays, yet they hide it and pretend it's not there. Recent cover ups in the Catholic church of widespread child abuse is unfortunately lumped into the same category, and that goes all the way up to the pope. When will people realise that religion is little more than social brainwashing and social control. Christian gays with hangups and guilt complexes: get over it, and get a life.

i was so confused by this titil...

Prayers for Bobby the movie just won a GLAAD award:) signourney weaver was way better in this movie than avator by the way....

A lotus for him:
May he be free from suffering and enmity
May he never again encounter hatred and delusion
May he be free from Samsara and its bonds
May he attain the Final Bliss of Nirvana!
"There are those who do not realize that one day we all must die. But those who do realize this settle their quarrels."
The Dhammapada

An old Catholic prayer for his repose:
"May Eternal Rest grant unto him, O Lord and let Thy Perpetual Light shine upon him and may he rest in peace"

finally someone corrected the headlines... :D

I don't think the church necessarily only imposes its rules on gay people, it's just that modern gay culture is at odds with their often casuistic ideology, and thus a focal point of attack. We as gay men have been instructed to celebrate the body too much at times, and we always seek the sensual rather than spiritual. It is myopic on both our parts to believe only what we want to, and those who try to see both sides of the story tend to become very confused as few people think homosexuality and religion can coexist.

At the end of the day we have to recognize that being homosexual is simply an attraction to one's own sex, and does not impact upon any moral or cultural aspect of one's life. The problem is we have associated homosexuality with a very urban construct, that of being 'gay', and while it is necessary to band together at a time when homosexuals are maligned and sometimes the subject of bigotry we have to learn to accept ourselves first before others can accept us. Acceptance does not exist at a financial or sexual level, nor does it lie in forgoing wealth or inhibiting the sensual, as religion tries to make us believe, it lies in seeing ourselves as normal people.

@ commenter 30 -

Modern gay culture? Read up on history and you will find them exercising their "rules" on various gay people and practises.

well, dont be a bitch to others ... pay more attention, say hello ... ask about their wellbeing and mean it! ... sometimes, a simple ' You OK? " goes a long long way ... best wishes, stay healthy and stay well ...

xoxxoox
Ken

PS. there are several contributors in this forum that people should ... well, be aware of ... ... ... bottom line, dont get too worked up or influenced by what was written here ... we do not know these people, their leaning(s) and or hidden agenda ... if any

its a tragic and sad incident... on the positive side, he may release freely from being torn between sexuality and religion... but on the other side, will it give a negative impact to young gay men around the world? or will it put an impact to youngsters that lessen their confidence of being gay?

I just feel that if no one is going to kill you because you're a homosexual, don't kill yourself. There're many Christians who're homosexual. If you think there's nothing wrong with you being a homosexual, don't judge yourself so hard when others aren't suppose to judge you.

My wife always say, "We can always agree to disagree". They don't have to agree with you in anything you believe, the same for you, you don't have to agree in anything they believe in. If they think you're wrong & if you think they're right, that's when you'll start to feel guilty, that's what they want.

i think at some point every person needs (not does) to forget what others think of them personally, their beliefs and actions and do what is natural.

Im not saying come out but personally couldnt give a rats ass what a church or anyone thinks.

live

sigh*.... one thing .. sad.. i hope in the future is more better ..for people like us ..

Religion - it tears people apart, it almost tore me apart.
Period.

Religion kills...

Personally, i'm a non believer, i mean why should i believe in things that i can't see myself? Who created the scriptures and bibles anyway? Aren't all those used for controlling people's mind? Why should i follow what's writen in there since it's made by human beings to begin with? Wouldn't it be foolish to follow something that could be wrong, or worse let you end up dead?

OH Jeeeeezus homosexual people are such wimps, I just went and found a religion that I was comfortable with and that didn't have problems with my sexual orientation...bye bye Christianity… simple... vote with your feet, I have no time for homos who bang forlornly on the doors of religious institutions seeking acceptance, you give these institutions too much power and credence by doing so, you diminish their power by leaving and helping build a healthy alternative else where... simple... uncomplicated... that’s how new movements rise... create new paradigms by stepping out of the old ones before they collapse and have a strong healthy replacement.

by the way when in New York go see Next Fall, its getting mixed reviews, but story and writing is superb, acting just so so.... then go see Billy Elliot for a really good time:)

Being an athiest I've never had to deal with the stigma that most religions try to put on certain things. It is sad that most religions still play the guilt factor which causes alot of internal anguish. I know in my heart what is right and wrong, I don't need anyone else telling me. Of all the ways to commit suicide I think the way this poor guy chose would be the last way I'd want to go.

This article struck me to the core.

I'm a father, ex-Mormon and now an Anthiest. I was sent away to behaviour modification and church therapy for many years. The pressure was so intense that I attempted to take my life twice at age 40.

NOW, I believe in being true to myself and work with gay-students at my high school, in teaching them that THEY ARE NORMAL and no religion, god or group of people have the right to tell them otherwise.

I am so proud to be gay and couldn't imagine being anything else!

what a tragedy

Some religions seem to think that they hold a universal patent on god; some kind or trademark or copyright, maybe, too.

They will thunder at you: "This is the Only god, the Real god, This is the Only name of god, all others are false", blah blah blah.

But god does not come with a particular name or passport number or social security number, for someone to say that This is god and That is NOT god.

If this so-called real god of theirs is so powerful, why does he need you to do his dirty work for him? Why can't he deal with you himself once you're dead and at his mercy? Why are these people taking it upon themselves to attack you in the name of this "loving" god of theirs?

Any religions that talk about true and false gods are evil. The very nature of their understanding of god makes them evil; the cause of most suffering on this planet today.

As stated in the ancient Rig Veda of Hinduism, thousands of years before these prophets of hate even came into being:
"the Truth is one but the sages call it by different names".
Hinduism, even while having millions of gods, also regards them all as different aspects of the same One Reality, whatever that is supposed to be.

These ancient philosophies, including Buddhism, Daoism, and so on, could all have, just as easily, laid claim to THEIR god as the TRUE god. They could all just as easily have declared that anything else was false, evil, etc. But they didn't, and they don't. Such claims are made only by shallow, self-serving religions stage-managed by insecure, paranoid people.

Here's a simple test for you: Ask yourself, does your religion, which endlessly blackmails you emotionally by bombarding you with declarations of god's love for you, use terms like false gods, false prophets, devil's spawn, non-believer, infidel, etc. to turn you away from others? If so, it is EVIL. Shun it.

Even a drop of poison in a pot of honey makes the whole honey pot poisonous. You wouldn't drink from it, would you?

It is very simple. Both the Quran and the Bible consist of half Truth half Lies, written by the devil to steal, kill and destroy. They did not even know that Jesus, the Son of God, is queer on Earth 2000 years ago, died on the cross and purchased gay marriage, making homosexuality holy and divine. The homosexual who commited suicide died and in the end in heaven finds that His God is queer! He wanted to come back on earth to re-live his life again and get married to a man, but it is too late, since he could only enjoy gay marriage while in this body, in this life, NOT in the life of ressurection. This is the goal of Satan: wastes your time of 'change', makes you trample on the grace of God of queer marriage, feel miserable, then when you die, you go to heaven but you cry, cry and cry for gay marriage but will never have it again.

Wake up! Homosexuality is holy and divine, cos' Jesus is queer. Since God is queer, anyone claims to be able to change homosexuality claims to be greater than God. But who is greater than God and change Him? Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever! Satan deceives the church and Muslims and mislead them, so that queer people can never find a refuge when those religious people who claims to have the Truth preach a lie instead.

Thus, it is urgent to start a new religion, proclaiming the Jesus is queer, purchased gay marriage on the crosss by His blood. He struggled so that we no need to struggle anymore now. Never commit suicide, cos' once you do so, you will never enjoy His grace of gay marriage anymore!