Professor Zhang Beichuan, a leading expert on HIV and AIDS at Qingdao University, has been collating stories of women who find themselves in relationships with in the closet homosexuals.
Zhang told the Global Times that about 80 percent of homosexual men in China get married because of traditional family values and that many of the women have no idea about their partner's sexuality.
Zhang says that although these relationships are often marked by secrecy, violence and abuse, women stay silent for fear of being discriminated against by society.
"During the dating stage, they pretend to be passionate about their girlfriends, and have close physical contact and regular sex with the women. But once they have been married and look conventional they can change their attitudes and become cold and indifferent to their wives," Zhang said.
Global Times profiled three women who found themselves in marriages with gay men. Zhang said that the most common complaint was a lack of intimacy or companionship in relationships. "They told me their marriages were unbearably lonely. There were hardly any kisses or cuddles, no affection and no sex with their husbands," he said.
He also pointed to a recent survey of 173 straight wives of gay men by Harbin Institute of Technology. It revealed that around 30% of the couples had never had any sex and that 90% reported some form of emotional or physical abuse. Only around 30% of the couples had filed for divorce.
Zhang also called for the gay community to improve its ethical education. "The issue of gay-straight marriages ultimately is a problem of ethics and morality. It is important to educate gays not to marry women for their own self-centered interests," he said.
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The other lecturer spoke about attempting to teach English as the preferred foreign language at university level.
What seemed to be the concensus of BOTH lecturers was that Chinese people, having lived so very very long governed by ancient family structures and traditions as well as an incredibly hugh autocratic governmental machine are very 'withdrawn'. On of the lecturrs admitted that young students are so shy they have huge difficulties speaking openly in front of their own class-mates … in their OWN language. Trying the same thing in English almost brings some to tears.
A few days after the lectures I was driving through the city near the university and spotted a young Asian male in very conseervative clothing but with super bleached red/blonde hair. I stopped the car and went over to him to as if he was Cinese and he said yes. I complimented him on his 'hair-style' and asked why he hd done it.
His words in reply came as a most complete and wonderful surprise!
He said …"I want to be different !!!"
Bless him! Now just 1.3 billion to go !!!
How can they be verified to be straight? They could be lying.
Maybe they were entirely happy not having sex.
Emotional OR physical abuse. So out could all be emotional abuse that was recorded. And so 10% could never have had an argument!!! Well, these would obviously be lying.
Zhang might want to check that straight men don't marry for their own interests also.
The world no longer needs more people...so its time to lose outdated thinking.
Oh dear
Totally agree. Vive la décroissance!
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