Fridae

yes, gay need having own society such as:
= Gay Bank, Gay hospital, Gay commerce, etc

So it's not lying that's the issue but who you lie to?

Totally bonkers!

Just be yourself and don't fear the fear.

Ghettoising gays is the worst thing to do. Never hide.

in real life, many heterosexual couple men an women have no children. Then they adopt children or their brothers-sisters gave them children to adopt.

If gay hide own life mean gay had been lost and that is not healthy.
Remember that some people behavior are love giving pressure as their happiness, they feel win when other get pressure.

in contrary, those who gave pressure- did not want to get Pressure.
so who should get Pressure?
that is the battle

Seems you have never lived in China nor do you understand their way of thinking GTiLad. Until you do both please stop giving advice that will not work for someone else. Before you become your usual idiotic self, yes, I've lived in China. Yes, I've talked to many young gay men and have come to understand the problems and the pressures they face...mostly from family.

Well, that is usual of GTiLad. Living in his own ivory tower & shooting his idiotic mouth off.

I don't buy the two weak(er than water) arguments posted directly above, they support silence, and if we learned anything from the gay rights movement, silence = death. The most abhorrent aspect of this semi-practical solution is it continues the cycle of repression and puts societal and cultural norms ahead of individual human needs. Unless you're a bleating sheep who likes being herded and forced to do as your told, nothing GTiLad said was even remotely idiotic.

This sham marriage "solution" isn't even practical. Not only are there 50% more gay males than there are lesbians, it perpetuates self-hatred and the stigmatization of homosexuality.

If our resident Chinese expert, AmericanBear, was more more clearer thinking, rather than projecting the homophobic attitudes of the bear community on others and playing nursemaid by empathizing with these "young gay men" and coming to "understand the problems and the pressures they face" -- he'd offer some beneficial advice.

If you're gay and living in the PRC: Break the fucking cycle of misunderstanding and scorn. You can start by:
1. Accepting your sexuality, loving yourself, and learning what a gift it is to be born gay.
2. Stop hiding your true self, your parents will love you regardless (it's quite possible one of them is gay also)
3. Do not get married to anyone you don't love, marriage is overrated anyway
4. If you are dumb enough to have children, do not raise them to shun homosexuality the way you were
5. If you're a student, contact a Chinese (or foreign) campus about getting an LGBT advocacy group starter kit, and form an association at your college.

It's easier said than done. It takes a lot of courage to stand up to widespread homophobia in one's society in Asia. Asian societies are largely conservative, more so in southwest, south and southeast Asia. Even in a most modernized society like Singapore, an overwhelming majority of the gays choose to be closeted and many choose to marry women. Even meeting fellow gays for hookups elicit real fears of being discovered. So if you are unable to put yourself in the shoes of gays facing the serious risk of persecution in their societies, it is best to refrain from judging married gays negatively. Idealistic pieces of advice will invariably fall on deaf ears due to their circumstances. I am not supporting marriages of convenience but this is just their stop-gap measure until their societies open up. Taiwan seems to be ready for the right direction.

" Yes, I've talked to many young gay men"

Please stop this.

Gay marriage is illegal in China. Fake marriage with innocent woman is immoral. What else should they do? Though I myself don't support this cooperative marriage thing, I understand many people need it. Chinese has a traditional way of thinking. Getting married and having kids are the most important things in life for most of them. A single man would be a public weirdo if he has already passed the age he "should" get married, not only himself but also his family will be an arrow target. Very hard to live in this Chinese society for them. Even so, there're still a few men with strong minds keep thier faith and are determined never to get married with women.

actually americanbore and nightindrinkingalealone are right. I'm a total idiot and now see that this marriage of convenience idea is amazing. Why did nobody think of it before?

The straights will never suspect a thing. Only gays will ever hear of the app so they will be none the wiser and never work out what is going on.

oh, back to reality. I'm not an idiot afterall.

Happy Christmas everyone! Don't eat too much now. Or bore people.

I had malay gay friend having boyfriend from china, the china man got marriage with a women just for making baby then they divorce. And the baby given to his malay boyfriend.

The Malay gay often went to china and stayed with chinesse family..the family accept the malay gay well.

yes, there should be reengineering of marriage and values of family, there should be no stagnancy/ freezing mind.

But God is one , single and unmarriage.
so, marriage is not suitable for God..it is the picture of Leadership that anyone who become leader should be single or no marriage.
Leader who get marriage is against God

And love is not calculate someone bad, good, single or marriage but to take care all. Mean that if child required, those having children should give to other who has not child because love is matter of giving, not selfish power

why there some gay venues in China?

we often fight each other, it is like boxing arena.
see who is audience while eating popcorn, who is referee, who is commentator, etc?

who are taking benefit from our fighting? and what are their education subject?..that become pattern of their behavior
they don't think hard, they do not work hard, they do not make creativity, they have no love, etc but they have position with high pay?

Dear Santa,

I know you're recovering right now but please can you try a little harder for a better version of Google translate for xmas 2017?

Cheers buddy

X

Peace and goodwill.